Wednesday, June 29, 2011

THE WOMAN IN MY LIFE

On one rainy day, such as we've been experiencing in Lagos lately, i got into an idle chat with a friend about the best way to spend the day especially if you are idle. Actually the best way to spend a rainy day(an idle one at that) is to stay indoors with your woman and retouch the basis of your love together. This talk led my thoughts to the fact that i've been single for the past two years. Though i've dated casually since, nothing or rather no one has been able to make me feel the need to date wholesomely again, not that i've met anyway. This is not to say that i've not seen anyone i'm attracted to, rather everyone that i'm really attracted to is taken already by another. Makes me want to ask; are there any single ladies in Lagos anymore? The rest that fall below attraction level for me, are those that fall short of the qualities i require of a woman, qualities which some men will consider as irrelevant. Yes! you look surprised, why? do i have a list of qualities i require of a woman? of course i do, i know what i'm looking for. After so many experiences of failed relationships, i made up my mind to give up dating till the right woman comes along. I compiled this list of 10 qualities of my Mrs right. Looking through the list you will notice that i left out qualities like beauty, sexy, and all those other irrelevant femininity that have made our girls forget to build themselves up in character and content. enjoy the read and feel free to indicate your objections.
1) The woman in My life, must be intellectually sound: This is not to say that i'm looking for an Einstein to date, it simply means i want a woman, in fact it means i find a woman with some depth regarding intellectual issue, to be sexy. What's not to like about such a woman? You can actually confide in her and seek her advice plus you two can have decent conversations.
2) She must be GOD fearing: Anybody who is GOD fearing can and will never do wrong. Infidelity will not be an issue, in fact she will be a source of blessing to you through her prayers.
3) She must be homely: We men are wild at heart. To tame us and curb our excesses, you need to keep us close to home. The moment home is not welcoming and we seize that as an excuse to roam, prepare for drama. What do we mean by homely? She cooks a mean meal, high sense of hygiene, even my Mama likes her. That's what homely implies.
4) socially conscious: Another word for this is, awareness of what is going on around. These include fashion, lifestyle, health, society, environment, etc. The last thing you i want is a rich spoilt kid that doesn't know what it feels like to need someone neither do i want a broke girl that would get carried away by material things.
5) A source of great support: Rather than nag, a woman with this quality will fill you up with confidence, zeal, and believe in yourself. She will be your number one fan, cheering you on even though you might be down. Rather than curse and complain, such a woman will bless you
6) Moral regard: This should come under GOD-fearing but then, it is a quality in its own right because a girl with good morals makes a good wife and that's the ultimate intention and objective of dating, for me.
7) Objective: She should be open to new ideas. She shouldn't be rigid and stuck up in her old ways of thinking, to the point of not knowing a good idea when she hears one.
8) Positive minded: Attitudes rub-off on us when we spend so much time with others. My mrs. right must be positive minded. She has to believe everything will turn out good as anything other than this will be a jinx. Pessimism dampens motivation and kills the will to achieve.
9) Prudent: In this time and season, what a brother needs is not a spender but a saver. Someone that will help maximize your resources, not someone that will help deplete it. This is not to say miserly is attractive or acceptable. We are just saying that a woman that knows when to cap the spending makes sense as companion.
10) Fun to be with: All said, a woman shouldn't possess all the important qualities and then forget how to be fun when around you. My woman must possess that factor that will make time spent together, totally enjoyable.

Tuesday, June 21, 2011

DOWN AND OUT?!

The search for My purpose has taken me through so many phases of Life. through it all, the only thing that never changed was my yearning for success. success is the end product of a trial phase, it is a destination of a trip called trial. My lack of manifestation is not a function of lack of potentials, rather it is a test of my mettle, a measure of my strong will, persistence, and perseverance. the difference between success and failure is the route taken. in the beginning, we all embark on a trip to make good off life. this trip starts the same way for everyone. this beginning is the birth of any person. so we march on, distance measured in unit time. the paths of success and failure separate at strategic locations, these locations are generally called tough times. they differ in appearance, some take the appearance of obstacles, misplaced priorities, unforeseen circumstances, hard times, financial constraints, etc.
These tough times being spoken about serves two purposes. The first of these purposes is to examine an individual's character content and from here, determine if such an individual has what it takes to ply the success route. the other purpose is for indicating i.e. tough times are like road markers on the path of success, their function is to indicate how far you've come in your journey. if you've been traveling the success route and have still not encountered these road markers called tough times, you need to re-assess your journey.
Now there is a particular class of tough times which i would like to talk about. A lot of people can relate with it. Before i proceed, here's a question for you: Have you ever been in a condition where people with lesser understanding of a subject, lesser skill in a form, lesser quality in a function, thrive better in ventures than you who is knowledgeable in the matters. Let me paint another scenario. Have you ever been in a situation where your expectations on the outcome of a particular endeavor which if compared with your potential in the said endeavor, should turn out better than the outcome you usually get? we all must have experienced those situations mentioned above. some persevere, whilst most quit. I'm not concerned about the multitude that quit since more often than not, their names get buried with their aborted ambitions.
This message is for the 'some' that persevere. A few punches will not do it, the objective is to bring down the glass ceiling. A few punches will make cracks, what will bring the whole ceiling(barrier) down is repeated punching.
This write up is inspired by the school of thoughts that believe breakthrough will come, no it on't!. Breakthrough is a doing word. you have to breakthrough the obstacle. The fact that you have to breakthrough should already give a vivid imagination of what one is up against. It is thick, hard, heavy, stubborn. to breakthrough, you have to be tough. read carefully the last paragraph.
People want a lot of good things but are not willing to put in the work required. the present day youth is more into being cool i.e. the reputation, forgetting the more important things. To conquer, you have to stoop, trust me you have to. Am still yet to find a success story that didn't have any down side to it at some point. Show me any heavyweight boxing champion that never got knocked down, i'm sure there's none. Champions get knocked down and they still rise again. The rest of them get knocked out hence the saying 'down and out'. stay up, HEADS UP!!!

Tuesday, June 14, 2011

SUPERSTAR by Wizkid

ARTIST: WizkiD


ALBUM: superstar
RATING: ***
rating keys: 5star(certified banger) 4star(hot stuff) 3star(very regular) 2star(not bad) 1star(step your game up)

Finally, the much anticipated debut album of your boy wizzy dropped on the 12th of june to much frenzy. The album release date kept being pushed back due to logistics but finally his people decided the time was right. You can cupp the softcopy of the album on notjustok.com
The Content: The album contains 16 tracks, some of which we've heard prior to the official release. guest appearances include banky w on 'slow whine', wande coal on 'for me' and d'prince on 'wad up'.
The Tracks: the album starts with the track 'call my name' which was one of the singles dropped before the album release. the track reminds one of the popular New Edition song ''i'll be your boyfriend''. With instrumentals from samklef, the song attempts to set the mood for some serious grinding and whining in the club but fails to do so effectively until the 5th track, which features mr. capable who brings some of his saltry delivery to an oft high tempo song giving the song that effect wizzy laboured to produce in the four tracks before. This is followed by 'love my baby', my personal favourite on the album. The song starts off with wizzy exhibiting some of the tricks on delivery he learnt from mr. capable only for the producer to marr this particular joint by overzealously trying to switch up on a track that was just fine without the up tempo he tried to induce. From here on, are familiar tracks like 'gidi girl', 'don't dull', and 'tease me' which is followed by 'for me' featuring wande coal. All the efforts at making us grind finally pays off on this one, as wande takes us to the club before schooling wizzy on how we like to whine. The lowest point on the album for me, is the verse by d'prince on the track 'wad up'. Here wizzy tries to reflect on how things used to be but then, how can you do that on a dance instrumental? On 'shout out', he reverts to the name calling formular again, just like he did on 'tease me'.
The Production: The production on the album is slightly above average, with nothing INGENOUSLY DISTINCT. Most of the instrumentals have got samples whose origin, the producer did little or nothing to conceal.
For a rapper turned crooner, the album leaves alot to be desired in the field of lyrical content. With rhyme schemes that end with grind and whine or mind most of the time, the songs are loaded with clichhe lines. we can only hope that the compromise on quality content will pay off in album sales.

Thursday, June 9, 2011

CORRECTIONS: AN ESSENTIAL

The only thing worse than not knowing is, not know that you don’t know. The greatest enemy of an individual is the self. Some people blame their woes and misfortune on circumstances not of their own making. Usually they go as far as blaming others for their problems.
It is true that no 2 individuals were born the same, but still the environment they both exist in is the same. One of the evidence of growing up is taking responsibilities for one’s actions. I’ve heard people blame all sorts of things for their woes. They blame the government for the bad economy that affected their businesses adversely, forgetting that some people still strive under the harsh economic situation. Relationships fail and either party involved blame the collapse on the other, absolving themselves off any guilt. Students with bad grades blame it on the tutor for not teaching effectively, blame it on the examiner for being too rigid in the conduct of the exams and timing it. They forget about the others that took the exams under the exact same circumstances passed well. A child fails to meet up to the expectations of the parents and s such, blame everything and everyone but his/her self. From blaming the parents for not raising him right, to blames of too much pressure from the expectations, we hear all sorts of flimsy excuses. Established stars conduct themselves inappropriately and lay the blames on the press for always wanting to cover negative stories, they blame fame for being intoxicating, they blame money for making it hard to have true friends around, some even go as far as blaming their advisers for not guiding them right.
All of these are just a few of the numerous scenarios we find ourselves in and don’t take responsibilities for. We make decisions and expect others to face the consequences of our actions. Is that right? The downside of this kind of mentality is that we will get away with the blame game initially, then get used to it until a devastating one will come along and we won’t be able to escape the fault. At this point, there probably wont be any remedy thereby leaving such individual a mere unfortunate statistic.
The moral of this write up is this, man up and take responsibilities for your actions. Rebuke and reprimand are not an attack on your personality, rather they are for corrections. Only individuals with yearning for perfection take to correction. Corrections heeded help in salvaging one’s glorious destiny. Stay blessed!!

Tuesday, June 7, 2011

SHOULD IT MATTER???

Sometime last week, I posted a tweet that reflected my thoughts and how I felt at the time. I quote the tweet here ‘should it matter that the beautiful swan was once an ugly duckling?’ I’ll try to relate , in the course of this write-up, the relationship between that quote and redemption.
In my early life, I was always described by 2 words, naughty boy. This descriptive was as a result of my inquisitive nature. In the real sense of it, I was mislabeled cause even when I had nothing up my sleeves, the general assumption was that I was up to something. This reputation followed me for a very long while. The incident that occurred and ultimately inspired this write up is this.
I was at a friend’s place to chill. Whilst there, 3 ladies walked out of a room in the house and immediately I set my eyes on her, I was smitten. She is the personification of beauty, grace, and the frailty of femininity. I mean, you’ld want to touch but then again you wouldn’t want to for fear that you might scar her. The rest of the time I spent at my friend’s place, my eyes stayed glued to her person, observing every detail, even how she chewed her meal. At this point, I was nursing inappropriate desires in my heart as I had confirmed that she actually is a sister of my friend. This singular factor made approaching her in his presence, inappropriate. Worst still, desiring her for anything other than friendship was going to be frowned upon by everyone, sincerely I wanted more. Somehow I got her number without compromising any principle of decorum as social network sites were there for accessing information on whoever you wanted to. We got talking and have been enjoying the compliment of each other’s company ever since. Then came this day, I was at my friend’s place again and somehow, my friend saw my blackberry messenger conversation with his sister and he went ballistic. I tried to calm him down by stating that my intentions where noble but he went on and on about how my intentions adds up to nothing but hurt and heartbreak for his sis……
This incident really hurt me and had me thinking. One of the most uttered quotes is: ‘change is the only constant thing in life’. To what extent we believe this quote, I don’t know. What I know is that we fail to acknowledge the potency of the power of change and how it remakes the character over time. Friends and family alike never cease to express their surprise at new traits we exhibit when they see us again after a long period of us being out of touch with them, like we are supposed to be the same person we were 5 or so years ago.
When the issue of reputation, antecedents, and repertoire come up, nobody ever considers that over time one might have changed. This takes us to the subject of ‘redemption’. From the biblical perspective, we are encouraged to embrace redemption with the assurance that our sins will be not only forgiven, but also forgotten. That’s a hell of an offer if you ask me, considering the sharp contrast of the secular system of justice where prior offences are recorded so they can resurface when one errs again. This might lead you to ask, is redemption a lofty pursuit outside the religious context? What is the essence of redemption then? In my opinion, embracing redemption is not to undo your past, neither is it to make a point. It is for one’s self/sake. A spiritual healing process, and a reflection of growth. How long shall we continue to fail in acknowledging the beauty of the swan because sometime back it was an ugly duckling???